Who said romance was dead? Certainly not this guy, who messaged me last week:
Now here’s the thing. I don’t mind his frankness. In fact, I like that Romeo gets straight to the point. As I’ve said before, I absolutely HATE a lot of back and forth, and appreciate when a dude takes a little initiative and suggests a time (I believe he generously provides not ONE but TWO possible days for us to hang out) and a place (his hotel).
Now, clearly, I did not respond to this. First of all, this guy’s approach is the exact same MO used by the Craigslist killer. Exact same. I mean, if this guy is, in fact, a killer, he should probably change it up a bit, because there are about 50 Wikipedia and news articles linking him to Phillip Markoff.
But, secondly,and even more offensively, this guy is a union buster. A scab. A strikebreaker. Sir, I have no problem if you want to top off your business trip with a lil somethin’ somethin’. Better men than you have done the same thing:
But, be a good American, and pay for your services. A google search of “escorts DC” (Hi there, NSA!) reveals that there are several lovely websites, clubs, and phone numbers you can call to get someone to come to your hotel for “some fun.” I am not about to undercut working girls by giving out the same goods for free. So buddy, I urge you to call “Appealing Act,”* and leave the good ladies of OKC to hang out with guys who will at least buy us a drink before asking us to give it up. And readers, I leave you with this glorious nod to organized labor. Long live unions!
*Please know, that during the researching of this post, I accidently added Appealing Act’s Google Plus page to my “family” circle, and had to spend the last 30 minutes figuring out how to remove them. #winningattheinternet
1) 95% friend. Not sure if that says something about you, something about OKC’s friend rating system, or both.
2) Request that he provides champagne; then it’s just like a date.
R–Yes, I noticed the high friend percentage (as well as the scarily high match percentage) too. Sigh. I think it says something about both of us. I am very choosy about the questions I answer because I have a personal rule that you should never put any information on the internet that you wouldn’t want your boss or your parents to read. (This is very hard, as a dating blogger, but until I am a celeb and can quit my 9-5, I am sticking to it!). So, I end up answering pretty benign OKC questions, and leaving the ones about sex, drugs, anything scandalous, blank, which means they don’t negatively affect my match percentage. So basically, as long as this guy knows basic math and geography and is a democratic non-vegetarian, he’s going to be pretty well matched with me, according to the questions. I do however, have a strategy for avoiding perverts, which involves a different OKC alter ego. I’ll be blogging about her soon.
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