This post could alternately be titled:
The One That Made D Cry at Her Desk, or
Maybe Dying Alone Isn’t So Bad, or
WHY? JUST, WHY?!
We just started chatting yesterday afternoon (about totally normal topics, I might add). He asked for my number this morning. More normal conversation, until he asked me about my dress code as a lawyer, a seemingly innocuous question. That quickly devolved into this. We have “known” each other for less than 24 hours.
I can’t even.
Does it make me a bad person that I’m more alarmed by “takeing” than the nylons?
I have always thought it was strange, though, that women wearing men’s clothing was totally acceptable but guys wearing women’s clothing was shameful.
Girls can wear boxer shots, tighty-whiteys, button-down shirts, t-shirts, hoodies, etc. A guy tries on a pair of hose or shaves his legs, and it’s a reason to freak out?
This coming from a man that threw the skinny jeans I tried to buy for him across the room in horror.
Also, D, may I suggest as consolation, http://www.buzzfeed.com/nataliem15/14-engagement-photos-that-will-make-you-happy-you-a0ne?utm_campaign=socialflow&utm_source=twitter&utm_medium=buzzfeed
Well if that didn’t just make my day, I don’t know what would! Thank you for that! Though I must say, I think the fairy wings would be a good look for me, I’m putting that idea in my back pocket. Profile picture perhaps?
R – You do know that since the end of the Victorian era, women’s underwear (aside from the thong), looks just like your treasured tighty-whiteys right? And when was a button down shirt exclusive to men? We gals call it a blouse, and it’s been around well before Brooks Brothers popularized it in 1896 after polo players. Before you comment on fashion PUH-LEASE get your facts straight. Also hoodies? Is that exclusively male? Were those worn in the 1800s while women were primatively wearing corsettes and then we vaginas hopped along and stole them from you oppressed little penises? How dare we steal your hoodies! TAKE BACK THE HOODIE, R!
1) I don’t treasure (or wear) tighty-whiteys.
2) I’m not saying button-downs are exclusive to men, but women wear men’s button-downs sometimes. It’s a seriously different cut (and size). And ditto with hoodies. Girls often wear male SO’s, family members’, and friends’ hoodies. Those hoodies are cut differently and are usually much too large.
3) I know my fashion well enough to know that the gender norm on this topic is pretty clear. It’s not at all weird for women to wear men’s clothing. It’s shocking when guys do the same.
Actually, what’s shocking is that a STRANGER told D in seemingly normal conversation that he stole a female family member’s pantyhose, essentially underwear, and that he likes to wear them. Let’s not pretend this is the same thing as throwing on an oversized hoodie. This is not about gender norms so much as it’s about online dating sites being a breeding ground for men with sexual fetishes (seriously, this person asked a stranger detailed questions about what types of stockings she wears and then shared that he steals them from his cousin) who harass women under the guise of trying to date them. A friend of mine on the same site was recently chatting with a guy (again, totally normal conversation) who out of the blue offered her $100 to do things I can’t mention on this blog to her feet. So excuse us if we “freak out” when men think it’s okay to drop this shit on us in casual conversation.
Harassing? Really? If a text conversation where a guy reveals that he wears pantyhose on occasion is harassment, the word is close to meaningless…
Lol okay, R. Honestly the post was originally meant to be a funny sharing of something weird that was said to D over messaging and clearly this conversation has taken way too serious a turn, which is partially my fault. I still maintain it was TOTALLY creepy and inappropriate, but I didn’t mean to be so dramatic in my reply. D was freaked out, as I would be, but she was also laughing about it, which I think is the appropriate response to these whacky encounters with strangers and frankly why we started this blog in the first place… to laugh about the crazy and random things that happen to us in the dating world. Surely you can appreciate that?
Indubitably. It’s the reason I keep coming back. Plus, I like to kick (metaphorical) hornets’ nests on occasion.
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Call me crazy, but I’m less concerned about his desire to wear nylons than I am the whole cousin thing. I’m all about getting weird with a partner, but a family member’s undergarments? Not so much.
And yes, WAY TOO much info for a first conversation. Via Text. From a dating site…
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